Life in our Shoes

Archive for the ‘Thing 2’ Category

In all of my 33 years of life, I have had every illness and disease known to man. Even a few that aren’t. Really. Google tells me so. Also, I have anxiety. The doctor told me that one. Google doctoring + anxiety = very bad news. Even worse when you are googling your kid’s symptoms. (PS- spellcheck keeps telling me googling isn’t a word. But, it is. I said so.)

There was this one time when Thing 2 was a teeny tiny baby that googling was beneficial. The doctor said he was fine. I said he had torticollis. Turns out I was right. He needed physical therapy and a corrective helmet to undo the damage done from tilting his head to one side all the time.

Right now, I hate google. With all of my being. Thing 2 has always had what the doctors called “prominent lymph nodes”. One on his neck and one behind his ear. You could see them if you really looked. In the past week (that I have noticed), you can now spot them, very clearly, from across a room. And there’s three of them.

He had an appointment tonight. I was hoping the doctor would say “it’s nothing, everything is fine”, even though I wouldn’t have settled for that answer. Because that answer isn’t an answer. That isn’t the answer I got anyhow. I believe the words the doctor used were “this is concerning”. If he was sick or had a cold, or a sore throat, or anything really, she wouldn’t be concerned. But, he doesn’t. Just really large lymph nodes. She gave me a prescription for bloodwork and said I “don’t need to rush out to get it done, or lose any sleep over it”. I told her I already did lose sleep and I will be there when they open the doors in the AM.

I hate this. I’m trying to hold it all together, especially because there are a ton of other things stressing me out right now as well. I don’t know that I am holding it together well, and I can feel my anxiety attacks coming back a little more each day.

It took me a while to come up with a good descriptor word for Thing 2. But, after much thought, I decided on impulsive. He rarely thinks before he acts. I don’t think he intentionally misbehaves, but it happens. More often than it should. Often to a point where I just have no idea what to do about it. I could really use some new strategies, because everything I have tried simply does not work.

The most recent example of his behavior was yesterday. We were about 3 minutes from walking out the door to karate. Thing 1 decided she was thirsty, so I told her to grab a juice box for the car. Thing 2 has to have everything she has, so he went to get one as well. She got there first, so he just launched out and bit her. BIT HER. He never bit before. Never. It was as if no thought was even involved. He just did it. She bruised instantly and had teeth marks. In all of his four years, he never bit. But, yesterday he did. I was floored. I sent him to his room immediately and went to karate without him. The Squatch stayed behind to talk to him about his behavior. He knew it was wrong. He knows biting hurts. If you ask him how he could have handled the situation better, he can tell you that. Which is why I am fairly certain he acts out of impulse.

Something as simple as dropping a fork on the floor at dinner can send him into complete hysterics. Rather than asking for a new fork, or getting down and picking it up, he will slam his fists down and scream. Then cry about it. Once I get him to calm down and think of what he should do instead, he will get down from the chair, put the fork in the sink and get a new one.

If Thing 1 happens to be in his way to see something (book, TV, etc) he will just hit her. Or throw something. He often can’t walk past a toy without kicking it over just because. I find myself asking multiple times a day “Why on Earth did you do that?” Though, I am always met with the same response. “I don’t know”

He has even gone as far as to hit me when I tell him it is time to go to bed, or clean, or some other thing he doesn’t want to do at that particular moment. Talking to him doesn’t work. Time outs don’t work. Taking things away doesn’t work. Rewarding good behavior doesn’t work.

I am at a complete and total loss as to what to do. Send Super Nanny my way please.

We have had a whirlwind of a week. Stress hit me like a ton of bricks. From fertility doctors to making offers on houses to karate tournaments. I’m sure the first two things will be worth the stress in the end, whenever that may come, but for now I *know* the stress of tournaments was worth it.

I took a chance and entered Thing 1 and Thing 2 in the Amerikick Internationals at the Convention Center. I knew it was huge for a first tournament, but they had missed the local ones and begged to do it. I was assured they would only compete against their belt level, and that everyone gets a medal no matter what.

Color me surprised when Thing 2 ( a white belt) competed against a yellow belt. Obviously, the yellow belt won, but since there was only two of them, he got second place. Second place winners take home a sweet trophy (pictured below). He did very well, considering this was his first time in front of an audience and he was up first. He started to cry in the beginning, but miracle of all miracles, he took a few deep breaths, pulled himself together, looked the judges right in the eyes and completed his kata.

Thing 1 was in the next age bracket, so (thankfully) they didn’t compete against each other. She also had to compete against a yellow belt and three orange belts. That was just not even fair. Of course their katas were more intricate, they have been doing karate much longer. But I digress. She did amazing anyhow. She won 4th place, which brought immediate tears to her eyes. We had a little talk about good sportsmanship and the fact that she had to compete against kids that were at a much higher level. In the end, she was proud that she beat one of the orange belts and earned herself a “trophy that can be worn like an accessory” aka-a medal.

Day two of the competition we had to be up at 6AM to make it there on time. Thing 1 instructed us to come in her room and wake her up by saying “Cock a Doodle Doo” We did. She’s like the puppetmaster. Knowing what to expect, I was slightly less stressed than the previous day. I’m sure I was more nervous than the kids were. Turns out it was much more organized than the previous day. White belts only competed against white belts. Well, except for the 4 year olds. Thing 2 competed against a white/yellow belt and a white/blue belt. He came in third and scored himself yet another trophy. But, Thing 1? She rocked it! She won first place. All the tears of the day before were long forgotten when they announced her name. And, the look in her eyes when she saw the size of her trophy? Priceless.

I know better than this. I know not to play the what if game. It leads down a very slippery slope into no good, very bad land. It also makes my anxiety (and comfort eating) increase by tenfold. But today, I’m doing just that.

The day started off great, which around here generally means if things start off great, they have no other way to go but down. We were buying Thing 2 a new bike, Thing 1 a new skateboard and everyone was just generally happy. Some house news came in that was great (but later turned out to be the beginning of the bad day). That led to an upsetting phone call that took my sensitive, cry over everything self, a long time to calm down from. Once I did, another call came in that started me in tears all over again. But, that is all irrelevant.

I don’t know if I had an extremely short, bad day, induced fuse or if Thing 2 was behaving extra badly. That line kind of gets blurred for me on occasion. Either way, I just did not have the patience to tell him for the 50th time to stop pulling apart the playhouse and smashing the pieces into things. So, I sent him to his room and told him to sit quietly until I said he could come down. He usually doesn’t sit quietly, and in fact often turns on his radio and sings. Some punishment, huh?

Anyhow, this time he was quiet. Never, ever trust a quiet four year old. I don’t know how much time passed. It could have been 30 seconds or 30 minutes or 30 years for all I know. I just know it was too quiet. So I called for him to come down. He didn’t. I jokingly said to The Squatch, “Hey, maybe he fell asleep!” Wishful thinking.

He wasn’t in his bed. Or in his closet which is his go to hiding spot. Or in fact, anywhere in his room. My next stop was the bathroom. Nope, not there either. Was he perhaps in Thing 1′s bed? No. On a whim, I opened her closet. My heart stopped. It was like I was living my nightmare (literally. I’ll post my nightmare at the end of this post)

There sat Thing 2 with a plastic bag over his head. Not the grocery store kind, but the kind that a sheet set would come in. It felt like it took me a million years to bend down and pull it off. He was fine, wide awake and alert, but he knew I was clearly upset. I think he perceived my tears and shaking as upset over his behavior as he repeatedly apologized while I just hugged him, rocking on the floor.

We had a talk (that also included Thing 1) about the importance of never, ever putting anything over your face and why. He told me that he wasn’t having trouble breathing but that he promised never to do it again anyhow.

I, on the other hand, promised myself to never leave plastics bags laying around. I feel awful. What if I had assumed he fell asleep and didn’t go up to check? What if I waited a few minutes longer? What if, what if, what if?

Rescue Remedy is my best friend today.

Oh, right, I almost forgot. My nightmare. It was about two weeks ago. I dreamed I came into the room looking for Thing 2 and he was sitting with a plastic bag over his head. Only I found him too late. And unlike most dreams (nightmares) it never faded. It is still crystal clear in my head. The sights, the sounds, the way he felt in my arms. I woke up shaking. Much like I am feeling right now. Because I just can’t stop the shaking.

Little buddy, I can’t imagine life without you. So, let’s keep the what ifs as only what ifs. They never need to become a reality.

The creativity of kids always amazes me.  We all sat down to play Legos, and while the kids dived right in to the huge box of rainbow colored bricks, I sat there and stared at them.  They made no sense to me.  Just a jumble of colors and shapes.  I had no idea where to even begin.  So I did what any other super creative Mommy would have done.  I grabbed the instruction booklet.  I’ll show them!  I’ll have the coolest speedboat rocket ever, because I have a book to follow!

Not only was my speedboat rocket the least creative, but it took the longest to build because I had to search for the exact piece I needed.

Check out our finished products

This is Thing 2′s creation.  It’s a “cool machine” that drives through town and sucks up all the trash. There’s actually a Lego with an arrow on it on the back that shows where the trash gets sucked in.  Then it all stays trapped up inside that yellow piece on the top.  There’s rockets on the bottom, so it can fly if it needs to.

This one was a joint effort.  Made by Thing 1 and The Squatch.  It is some kind of magical mystery cookie machine.  That’s what Thing 1 always makes.  They always look very different, but they always make cookies.

Hold on to your seats..you are about to see the product of my hard work.

Someday, I will make an amazing Lego creation using only my imagination.  Today is not that day.